Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Kissing Scenes = HATE!

Even though it’s not the last week of April yet I have a confession. I’m 22, and I haven’t had my first kiss yet. Personally I’m getting a little antsy, but as an individual I can live with out it. However, as a writer it blows.

Every time I get to a kissing scene I freeze because I have no experience whatsoever to draw from. Oh, I can fake the emotional stuff like the warm fuzzes, the little light headed buzz, and the surrealness of the situation. It’s the physical stuff and the mechanics of kissing that get me.

If you’ve already had your first kiss the whole process probably doesn’t seem all that complex and mysterious to you, but from where I’m standing it’s like this huge brain teaser that I have no idea how to solve. I don’t even know where to start. What does it feel like to be pressed against someone? What does it taste like? Does it even taste, or is it a naive assumption that it would? How do you know when to kiss someone and when not to? Do you just smush your lips together or is there more to it than that?

Over Christmas Break I went so far as to try to remedy the situation by getting my first kiss, but it didn’t end so well. I felt like it wouldn’t be smart to just randomly kiss a guy in case they got the wrong idea, so I decided to ask the men I knew if they’d help me out. My ex thought I wanted to get back together, a friend from high school was all for it but only if I’d date him, and a socially awkward family friend actually had an anxiety attack.

After those lovely experiences I’m back to avoiding kissing scenes like the plague and faking it when every other alternative fails.

Does anyone out there have any advice on writing a kissing scene for someone with no personal experience?

- Aaron


  1. Read lots of kissing scenes. Especially YA "first kiss" scenes. When they're well written, your heart will flutter. And that's what it really feels like!

  2. That's basically what I do, but when I go to write a kissing scene it always feel like I'm ripping off other authors' material: a pinch of her's, a dash of his', just a little of theirs.